tim drake’s snapchat is 90% him making bruce wayne do normal middle-class american things and filming the results. popular youtube compilations include the one where they’re at denny’s at two in the morning and tim keeps trying to get bruce to order a moon over my hammy just so he’ll have to say it, the one where they’re at disneyworld and bruce gets increasingly frazzled culminating in him actually physically picking up gaston for reasons no one can entirely recall, and everyone’s favorite series “bruce wayne doesn’t understand walmart”
having thought about it the best part is probably when a pranking fails because bruce has such a bizarre patchwork of knowledge/skills and it does not occur to him to hide most of it. tim puts a ghost pepper in bruce’s food but bruce just eats it like nothing is wrong. the same thing happens with the chocolate-covered crickets. it turns out bruce can lick his own elbow. bruce can lasso a runaway robot lawnmower like it’s a calf at a rodeo. whenever tim expresses shock that bruce knows how to do something he says “i did go to college, tim” as if that explains anything and it becomes a meme. whenever anyone does something fucking absurd it just gets tagged “i did go to college, tim”.
Teen Titans headcanon that every now and again, about once every few months, Robin gets a message from the Justice League that Batman, his father, was killed in duty. And every time, while the Titans are freaking out and sympathetic, Robin is just like nah, he’s fine. The League assures him that Batman’s sacrifice was not in vain, that he loved Robin dearly. Rob, meanwhile, is like eating nonchalantly eating waffles and all let me know when he shows back up.
And of course two days later, they get a sheepish call from the League. They have found Batman and he is very much alive, sorry to worry everyone. In the background you can hear other League members freaking out.
“I saw him get kidnapped by a Kraken and dragged under the water!”
“He crawled out of an avalanche with half a batarang and a lighter!”
“We left him. In dead space. For t w o d a y s.”
Robin just grunts and goes back to obsessing over his casefiles. The Titans are shivering in a corner. Who is this Batman that he can survive such ordeals? How on Earth did Robin survive his partnership? As curious as they are, they hope they will never meet the Batman
¯_(ツ)_/¯ 